It was a dreadful and a sleepless night with us all; or if
I did slumber upon the hard floor for a moment (for we had neither seat
nor covering), it was to startle at the cries of my child wailing for
hunger, or the smothered sighs of my unhappy partner. Again and again I
almost thought them the voice of the Judge, saying, 'Depart from me, ye
cursed.'
"I again hurried out with daybreak, for I was wretched, and resumed my
inquiries; but night came, and I again returned equally successful. The
yearnings of my child were now terrible, and the streaming eyes of his
fond mother, as she pressed his head with her cold hand upon her lap,
alone distinguished her from death. The pains of hunger in myself were
becoming insupportable; my teeth gnashed against each other, and worms
seemed gnawing my heartstrings. At this moment, my dear wife looked me
in the face, and, stretching her hand to me, said, 'Farewell, my love,
in a few hours I and our dear child shall be at rest! Oh! hunger,
hunger!' I could stand no more. Reason forsook me. I could have died for
them; but I could not beg. We had nothing to pledge. Our united wearing
apparel would not have brought a shilling. My wife had a pair of pocket
Bibles (I had once given them in a present): my eyes fell upon them--I
snatched them up unobserved--rushed from the house, and--Oh heaven! let
the cause forgive the act--pawned them for eighteenpence.
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