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Blackmantle, Bernard

"The English Spy An Original Work Characteristic, Satirical, And Humorous. Comprising Scenes And Sketches In Every Rank Of Society, Being Portraits Drawn From The Life"

During his absence I employed the interval in
amusing myself with a small octavo volume, entitled the "Oxford
Spy:" the singular coincidence of the following extract according
so completely with the previous remarks of the doctor, induced me to
believe it was his production; but in this suspicion, I have since been
informed, I was in error, the work being written by Shergold Boone, Esq.
a young member of the university.
"Thus I remember, ere these scenes I saw,
But hope had drawn them, such as hope will draw,
A shrewd old man, on Isis' margin bred,
Smiled at my warmth, and shook his wig, and said:
'Youth will be sanguine, but before you go,
Learn these plain rules, and treasure, when you know.
Wisdom is innate in the gown and band;
Their wearers are the wisest of the land.
~125~~
Science, except in Oxford, is a dream;
In all things heads of houses are supreme {9}
Proctors are perfect whosoe'er they be;
Logic is reason in epitome:
Examiners, like kings, can do no wrong;
All modern learning is not worth a song:
Passive obedience is the rule of right;
To argue or oppose is treason quite:{10}
Mere common sense would make the system fall:
Things are worth nothing; words are all in all.


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