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Day, Holman (Holman Francis), 1865-1935

"All-Wool Morrison"


"Seeing that nobody else seems to want to express an opinion on the
subject, I'll tell you what the matter is, as I look at it," ventured
Stewart, chattily matter-of-fact. "We're all native-born Americans in this
room. Right down deep in our hearts we're not afraid of our soldiers. We
good-naturedly indulge the boys when they are called on to exercise
authority. But from the time an American youngster begins to steal apples
and junk and throw snowballs and break windows a healthy fear of a regular
cop is ingrained in him. It's a fear he doesn't stop to analyze. It's just
there, that's all he knows. Even a perfectly law-abiding citizen walking
home late feels a little tingle of anxiety in him when he marches past a
cop. Puts on an air as much as to say, 'I hope you think I'm all right,
officer--tending right to my own business!' So, in this case, it's only
your ingrained American nature talking to you, gentlemen! You're all
right! Nothing is the matter with you! It ought to please you because you
feel that way! Proves you are truly American. 'Don't monkey with the cop!'
Just as long as we obey that watchword we've got a good government!"
Senator Corson was more infuriated by that bland preachment than he would
have been by vitriolic insult.


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