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Jacobs, W. W., 1863-1943

"Deep Waters, the Entire Collection"

Did you find as 'ow the mud did you any good?"
I looked at 'im hard, but 'e stood there looking at me with his fat baby-
face, and I knew he didn't mean any harm; so I answered 'im perlite and
wished 'im good night.
"I've 'ad pretty near everything a man can have," he ses, casting anchor
on a empty box, "but I think the rheumatics was about the worst of 'em
all. I even tried bees for it once."
"Bees!" I ses. "_Bees!_"
"Bee-stings," he ses. "A man told me that if I could on'y persuade a few
bees to sting me, that 'ud cure me. I don't know what 'e meant by
persuading! they didn't want no persuading. I took off my coat and shirt
and went and rocked one of my neighbour's bee-hives next door, and I
thought my last hour 'ad come."
He sat on that box and shivered at the memory of it.
"Now I take Dr. Pepper's pellets instead," he ses. "I've got a box in my
state-room, and if you'd like to try 'em you're welcome."
He sat there talking about the complaints he had 'ad and wot he 'ad done
for them till I thought I should never have got rid of 'im.


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