"
Oh, when men see God and themselves, it fills them with holy fear of
the greatness of the majesty of God, as well as with love to, and
desire after, his mercy.
What is poor sorry man, poor dust and ashes, that he should crowd
up, and go jostlingly into the presence of the great God?
For my part, I find it one of the hardest things that I can put my
soul upon, even to come to God, when warmly sensible that I am a
sinner, for a share in grace, in mercy. Oh, methinks it seems to me
as if the whole face of the heavens were set against me. Yea, the
very thought of God, strikes me through; I cannot bear up, I cannot
stand before him; I cannot but with a thousand tears say, "God be
merciful to me a sinner." Ezra 9: 15.
At another time, when my heart is more hard and stupid, and when his
terror doth not make me afraid, then I can come before him and ask
mercy at his hand, and scarce be sensible of sin or grace, or that
indeed I am before God. But above all, they are the rare times, when
I can go to God as the publican, sensible of his glorious majesty,
sensible of my misery, and bear up, and affectionately cry, "God be
merciful to me a sinner."
At certain times the most godly man in the world may be hard put to
it by the sin that dwelleth in him; yea, so hard put to it, that
there can be no way to save himself from a fall, but by imploring
heaven and the throne of grace for help.
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