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Wilde, Oscar, 1854-1900

"An Ideal Husband"

I make it a rule never to accept Tommy. That is why
he goes on proposing. Of course, as you didn't turn up this morning,
I very nearly said yes. It would have been an excellent lesson both
for him and for you if I had. It would have taught you both better
manners.
LORD GORING. Oh! bother Tommy Trafford. Tommy is a silly little
ass. I love you.
MABEL CHILTERN. I know. And I think you might have mentioned it
before. I am sure I have given you heaps of opportunities.
LORD GORING. Mabel, do be serious. Please be serious.
MABEL CHILTERN. Ah! that is the sort of thing a man always says to a
girl before he has been married to her. He never says it afterwards.
LORD GORING. [Taking hold of her hand.] Mabel, I have told you that
I love you. Can't you love me a little in return?
MABEL CHILTERN. You silly Arthur! If you knew anything about . . .
anything, which you don't, you would know that I adore you. Every
one in London knows it except you. It is a public scandal the way I
adore you. I have been going about for the last six months telling
the whole of society that I adore you. I wonder you consent to have
anything to say to me. I have no character left at all. At least, I
feel so happy that I am quite sure I have no character left at all.
LORD GORING. [Catches her in his arms and kisses her. Then there is
a pause of bliss.] Dear! Do you know I was awfully afraid of being
refused!
MABEL CHILTERN.


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