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Wilde, Oscar, 1854-1900

"An Ideal Husband"

The sum Baron Arnheim gave me I have
distributed twice over in public charities since then.
LORD GORING. [Looking up.] In public charities? Dear me! what a
lot of harm you must have done, Robert!
SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. Oh, don't say that, Arthur; don't talk like
that!
LORD GORING. Never mind what I say, Robert! I am always saying what
I shouldn't say. In fact, I usually say what I really think. A
great mistake nowadays. It makes one so liable to be misunderstood.
As regards this dreadful business, I will help you in whatever way I
can. Of course you know that.
SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. Thank you, Arthur, thank you. But what is to
be done? What can be done?
LORD GORING. [Leaning back with his hands in his pockets.] Well,
the English can't stand a man who is always saying he is in the
right, but they are very fond of a man who admits that he has been in
the wrong. It is one of the best things in them. However, in your
case, Robert, a confession would not do. The money, if you will
allow me to say so, is . . . awkward. Besides, if you did make a
clean breast of the whole affair, you would never be able to talk
morality again. And in England a man who can't talk morality twice a
week to a large, popular, immoral audience is quite over as a serious
politician. There would be nothing left for him as a profession
except Botany or the Church. A confession would be of no use.


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