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Wilde, Oscar, 1854-1900

"An Ideal Husband"


LORD GORING. Ah! that is morbid of you, Mrs. Marchmont!
MRS. MARCHMONT. [Brightening to a look of real pleasure.] I am so
glad to hear you say that. Marchmont and I have been married for
seven years, and he has never once told me that I was morbid. Men
are so painfully unobservant!
LADY BASILDON. [Turning to her.] I have always said, dear Margaret,
that you were the most morbid person in London.
MRS. MARCHMONT. Ah! but you are always sympathetic, Olivia!
MABEL CHILTERN. Is it morbid to have a desire for food? I have a
great desire for food. Lord Goring, will you give me some supper?
LORD GORING. With pleasure, Miss Mabel. [Moves away with her.]
MABEL CHILTERN. How horrid you have been! You have never talked to
me the whole evening!
LORD GORING. How could I? You went away with the child-diplomatist.
MABEL CHILTERN. You might have followed us. Pursuit would have been
only polite. I don't think I like you at all this evening!
LORD GORING. I like you immensely.
MABEL CHILTERN. Well, I wish you'd show it in a more marked way!
[They go downstairs.]
MRS. MARCHMONT. Olivia, I have a curious feeling of absolute
faintness. I think I should like some supper very much. I know I
should like some supper.
LADY BASILDON. I am positively dying for supper, Margaret!
MRS. MARCHMONT. Men are so horribly selfish, they never think of
these things.


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